Saturday, September 10, 2011

DOES GOD REALLY OWE ME?

(I am posting a letter I shared with Wayne Jacobson ; God Journey podcaster and author... on the morning of September 10, 2011.  I have also posted this  link...

God Journey Podcast: Not answering for God. July 15, 2011

to the podcast I was listening to at the time of writing this letter.)


I woke up this morning with this thought in my head. 

DOES GOD REALLY OWE ME?

It is September 10th.  Tomorrow it will be ten years since the collapse of the World Trade Centre.  My husband and I have been overdosing on 9-11 documentaries.  We have heard testimony from the families that lost loved ones that day; we heard interviews with George Bush, Condy Rice, Donald Rumsfeld, Rudy Guliani; we listened to story after story.  The documentary that challenged me the most was two hours of investigating faith through this experience.  What did people believe in light of 9-11?  How was their faith affected by the events of that day?  It was gut wrenching to hear how much God was blamed for what happened in New York, Washington and in a farmer's field in Pennsylvania. 

I am listening to the podcast "Not answering for God"  I have been so behind in my podcast listening due to a dead Ipod.  This morning I felt like I wanted to hear something.  Didn't know that the one that I would tune into would address the same thoughts in my head. 

So many authors have written books trying to help people through the tough times and their faith.  People need answers to the ultimate question... "Where is God when it hurts" 

I DON'T KNOW.

... was your answer, Wayne.

How profound. Wisdom gets a person to that place where the answers aren't a die hard need.  I wonder if people in this world believe that God owes them a peaceful and pain free life.  When that life isn't experienced... God gets the blame for it. 

DOES GOD REALLY OWE ME?

That is my question back to people.  There are stories of amazing rescues on 9-11 and there is the reality that there were those who hung out their window with absolutely no hope of rescue.  And people wonder where God was. 

There are no answers and the more we look for them, the more we will get disappointed with God. 
My thought and answer to that question... I don't think God owes me at all.  You mentioned Job and his experience and the conclusion at the end of the book.  God didn't answer Job's questions any better than he answers ours today.  I think God knows something that most of us have yet to figure out. 

"I DON'T OWE YOU."

God doesn't owe us anything... especially an explanation. 
What makes life beautiful is not getting what we deserve... but getting what we don't deserve. 

GRACE, MERCY, BLESSINGS, LOVE ...

That has made my life beautiful in the midst of a life that has unanswered questions and unexplainable circumstances.  It is what God has given me , BECAUSE He doesn't owe me, that has made my life beautiful.

I guess there is no question.  Sorry to bait you with one.  Makes it a rhetorical one then.  
Thank you again.  Still enjoying the conversation. 


Ruby Neumann
Edmonton, Alberta

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